Friday, October 31, 2008

things that go *sparkle*

last weekend, we took the BF's daughter to a Halloween thing for kids and pets. they had a band and food and one of those inflated things kids can jump in and arts and crafts. and by "arts and crafts" i mean "unsupervised access to vats of glue and buckets of glitter."

Kiddo spent almost an hour decorating foam pumpkin cutouts with red glitter and markers. when she was finished, she gingerly made the walk back with something in her hands she was carrying so delicately. we all assumed it was because she had made it with love and was taking extra special care to not drop it. when she got closer we saw that it was not a protective maneuver, it was a feat in balance and self-preservation. she had COVERED the pumpkins in glue and glitter, so much so, that it was dripppppping off of them. and they had all stuck to her hands and were defying gravity. when she put them on the table her father cringed in terror at the 3 year old that was also covered in almost as much glitter as the pumpkins. he picked her up and carried her to the bathroom at arm's length to try and clean her up.

i took that opportunity to make the drive home with the "art" as manageable as possible. Kiddo had dressed up as a rock star for the day and her Gran had made her a cardboard guitar. since the glue was obviously still wet, i scraped off the majority of it from the pumpkins and covered her "tar" with it. it looked pretty damned bad ass after i was done with it.

by the time i had that finished, both the BF and Kiddo came back from the bathroom all clean. and he took one look at me, now covered in glitter, and just shook his head. i said to him, "if you have issues with glitter, Mister, then you and i will NEVER work out!"

he laughed cause he knows its true.

and today is a prime example of that truthiness. we don't get to dress up for Halloween at work, but our boss told us we could wear silly hats. and you know me... i can't JUST get by with a silly hat, so i have glitter too! cause, yeah. i'm THAT girl.



Thursday, October 30, 2008


i have 2 baby brothers.
one is 23 and one is 24. they are 6 months apart.

HOW is that POSSIBLE?!?!?!?!?!

different parents, DUR.
(but i LOVE telling the story like that)

and speaking of the one that's 24, TODAY happens to be his birthday.

here's to many happy returns of your birthday, IAN!

(he's the ultra cute SINGLE one on the right, ladies...
the other one's taken)

Love you Bro!
oh and one more thing,


Tuesday, October 21, 2008

"I have nipples, Greg. Can you milk me?"

welp, i met the boyfriend's (still haven't figured out his pseudonym....) family on Saturday. and by family i mean the WHOLE Damn Family. not a simple, "hey honey let's have dinner with my folks at a nice restaurant". i mean 12 hours at their house with his daughter, Mom, Dad, 2 sisters, a brother-in-law, and a niece. PHEW.

we got there around 9 ish because his dad needed some help with cementing in some cinder blocks. so we ate breakfast, (hash browns with onions and scrambled eggs with onions) and then the menfolk got to work. i sat in the kitchen and talked to his mom about stuff. and crap. and junk. i asked her how she and her husband met, cause i got the abbreviated version from her son and thought, "i BET this is a good story. it HAS to be!" and over the next 5 hours, we chatted about where i've lived, where she's lived, how they met, how she wants to be a writer (kickass!), how i have a blog, how she wants to get into blogging, their trip to Eureka Springs, Arkansas (hehehehehe) and Life, the Universe and Everything. it was WONDERFUL. we chatted like we had known each other for years. she is a fantastic woman. i'm pretty sure that if the BF and i break up, she's gonna keep ME instead.

after the menfolk were finished with the laboring, we started working on dinner (pork chops covered in onions, scalloped potatoes with onions) around this time, the BF's sister and husband and niece arrived. and his sister asked IMMEDIATELY, "what's for dessert?" and of COURSE i piped up with , "well i fancy myself a baker". keep in mind that his dad was an executive chef. his brother-in-law is a chef at a restaurant in marble falls and his sister is no slouch in the kitchen either. GREEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEAT. collectively, we decided on apple pie. i said i would make a streusel topping for it. well it ended up that i made an apple crisp instead. which was even funnier, because his mom said, "wow that was the easiest dessert i've ever made!" ya know, since I championed the whole project! heh.

once we put dinner in the oven, we all hopped in the truck and went to the lake. i hadn't been on a boat since i was about 10. i was STOKED! we cruised around the lake for a bit. the majority of the family got IN the lake. (i am NOT that girl who jumps in lakes when it's OCTOBER) and we headed back tot he house. we assumed we were gonna be gone for about an hour. 2 hours later we get back to the house and can almost smell the food from the street. good thing we only put it in at 275 degrees. it all smelled so good.

we all got back to work finishing dinner and as his mom is cutting onions for the salad, i whispered to the BF, "will you ask her to scoop some out for me first and don't tell her that i'm allergic, k?"

he says, "HEY MA, we're gonna scoop some out cause she's all allergic to onions and all..."
thanks, dear.

her face turns white and you could see her going over the entire menu for the day and realizing that the ONLY things we didn't put onions in were the coffee and the apple crisp. she was mortified. which was what i was TRYING to avoid in the first place. reallllllly graceful, dear.

OH! i forgot this part. when we took the apple crisp out of the oven, i said to his dad, "that looks terrible, y'all ought not have any." he says, 'just wait and see what's left in the pan and THEN we'll decide" i said, "i was trying to say that i... ya know... have it all to myself...." he shoots back, "yeah, we are real familiar with THAT game. don't think you can try to get by with THAT move i mean we aren't THIS fat by letting someone ELSE eat our desserts!"

i... uhhh... yes sir.

so we ate dinner, that was SOOOOO tasty, and i was complimented on my apple crisp. yay me, i didn't poison them! and we wound down the night. we said our goodbyes and were on our way home. i didn't break anything. i didn't say anything out of line and i didn't shatter any family heirlooms. it was a good day.

i was informed yesterday that his dad called him and asked if i had a nice time and said "everyone seems to have liked her". having myveryownpersonal dad who is a man of few words, THIS was a pretty good indicator that i might get to come back.

i hope.

Friday, October 17, 2008


a conversation from last night

HIM: no you're lame, i'm gonna punch you in the taint.

ME: i'm gonna punch YOU.... in the taint!

HIM: i'm gonna punch you.... in... the ....uh.... FOREHEAD.

ME: i'm gonna punch the forehead WITH my TAINT!

HIM: i... uhh... yeah. you win.

Thursday, October 16, 2008

at the Town's End

so. when i was wee, my father got a yellow rose tattoo on his left wrist. last year for Father's day, my brother Ian got 2 yellow roses tattooed on his left wrist.

since i am ink heavy on my left side, i decided that if i got yellow roses, they would be on my right side. and i thought about maybe getting them on my ribs. (OUCH!) and then i decided to get them around my rabbit symbol i have on my back.

well, when Ian was in town last weekend, we FINALLY did it. i got my roses.

the artist, Craig, redid my rabbit, too to make it look REALLY kickass.
i love love love it!
Happy Birthday, Old Man. the Townsend roses are complete!

Wednesday, October 8, 2008


one week weigh in.

you ready?

i lost.... TEN POUNDS.

i KNOW not to expect results like this every week, cause i tried DAMN hard to kick start this weight loss. but still. now i think i shall reward myself with nail polish. i think for every pound lost that it will be a dollar towards my nail polish dependency fund.

and i have also decided that when i lose all the weight i want to, i am going shopping for new clothes.

side story: the other day i was thinking, "i haven't bought myself any new clothes in a WHILE, i should consider at least a new pair of jeans since the ones i love have a hole in the butt (aka the butthole jeans)" and when i was at target i DID buy myself some clothes. unfortunately they were pirate PJ bottoms. not EXACTLY what i was shooting for , but holy crapmonkeys they are cute!

OH and in addition to watching what i've been eating, i have also been drinking a metric fuckton of water. like a gallon a day. this is especially difficult when i am on the phone with customer service for someone and im doing the PeePee dance. WAY proffessional, no?

k. so. there you have it. YAY ME!
and thanks to all of you for your support and cheering (especially the BF who is doing FANTASTICALLY well too! keep up the good work, baby!)

Tuesday, October 7, 2008

phone tree

Allie called and activated the phone tree the other day. it's not my place to discuss why, but to all involved, know that we love you. and are there when you need us.

and if you need us to bring chocolate and nail polish and likker, just say the word.
but for now, i'm sending HUGE hugs.

with the love.

double dutch

one week weigh-in is MORRRRROW. and i am pretty stoked. i am doing a 2 day juice fast right now, and have been watching my caloric intake.

and i bought a jump rope last night. the thought of me jumping rope kinda makes me giggle. but exercise is exercise, right? i mean i'm pretty sure i will burn MORE calories jumping rope like a schoolgirl, than i will holding down my couch.

so.... we shall seeeeeeee.....

Wednesday, October 1, 2008

Fatty McGee

how funny that i follow a post about bacon cinnamon rolls with this post about starting a new diet today. the BF and i have decided that we are no longer going to be fatties and are going to lose some weight before the end of the year. i am going to lose 25. he's going to lose 30. we can TOTALLY do it. hell, we quit drinking for a month together, and made it. we can certainly diet together. we have both signed up on a calorie tracking site and my little progress meter is down at the bottom of the page. we are also both taking hoodia from my aunt's vitamin line and he wants me to join a gym with him. yeah... that one's gonna take a little bit more coercing.

the tough part is that both of our birthdays are coming up. as well as the holidays. at least i love a challenge. but im totally gonna do this. you just watch.