Sunday, July 6, 2008

el six-o

today would have been our 6th wedding anniversary. and its hitting me a little harder than i want it to. the loop in my head is "stop thinking about it, stop thinking about it, stop thinki... there you go again"


and i am having to sit on my hands to NOT send him SOMETHING... ANYTHING... cause nothing good will come of it. i know that anything i expect to get from him in a response will only hurt more. and sure, there's that tiny part that wishes, wonders, hopes that he realizes what today is.

and to make it worse, the 19th is 2 years since i moved out and last saw his face.
and the 29th would have been our 8th anniversary of being together.


yes, i know i have to let it go. and dammit, i do a really good job during the rest of the year. but FUCK, i hate July.

10 comments:

themommie said...

but this is August - cheer up - tomorrow is moving day - into your beautiful new place - pack, pack, pack - luhyou

Lola said...

i'm with the mommie, tomorrow is Moving Day! the Day of your Move to the Hamptons! it's time to start filling up your old dates with new occasions. time for drastic measures. what can we do today that will make next july 6th one year since we...

any celebreites we can stalk? "one year since you licked ami" has a nice ring to it, don't you think?

christelpistol said...

actually Ang and the Rottens are here moving little stuff. and when it was time to take my weeding dress down, i TOTALLY chucked it off the third floor landing. THAT felt good.


and we got pics too. i will post those shortly.

Allie said...

see, the thing is "THAT" man...he's not the one you married - this one is a douche.

and you have entered a no douchery phase of your life.

( easier said than done )

i know - but i'm here to give advice, not take it - silly girl

Allie said...

and - you wear a special dress to weed?

is it made of hemp?

christelpistol said...

allie, in fact i Do wear a dress for weeding.


WEEDING OUT LOSERS!

J. said...

Losers?

*looks around*

You Rang? >:p

christelpistol said...

even my adopted Mama had good words too. this is what Mama B emailed to me:



Darling, think hard. What would you be doing right now if you were still together? Do you like that person better than you like who you are now? Seems to me, you escaped becoming someone you didn't want to be. I know you are mourning what you thought your marriage was going to be something else, but that's not where Eddie was heading. Count your blessings and keep your head up. I know it hurts...but maybe, just maybe, you should be celebrating a little. You have so much to be proud of!!!!!

Ms. T said...

Sucky days reminiscing about no-good exes are to be dealt with in several ways:

1. Girlfriends
2. Alcohol
3. Shoes
4. Nails
5. Your food of choice
6. Popping the heads off voodoo dolls dressed as your ex

Tasty said...

Girl, I still think of Version 1.0 on December 31st. It "should have been" 14 freaking years this new year's eve... and it ain't. And, honestly? I'm glad.